Time For Serenity

A prayer of perspective for Adult Children of Divorce: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen. --Reinhold Niebuhr

A blog for Adult Children of Divorce is an ever changing thing.  It is  like the lives of ACODs everywhere.  Some things stay the same, other things change with time. After realizing that a new format will give you readers a chance to access the drop down tab on the top left where it says "side bar"   ,   the blog has a new look!!  I am hoping you will use the drop down the side bar choices  and choose a page that shows all the post titles ( I think there are 48 now?) .  That will give you a chance to see all that you can read about at one time.  I hope this is helpful. There are all the other features, but you may need to  hover your mouse over the categories vertically showing icons on the right side of the page . Explore the new format and hopefully you will find all the old things you liked and some new things that help you navigate the site too!  :) Don't forget to use the white search box in the upp...

Profound statements come from the mouths of adult children of divorce. Just recently while talking with someone going through the beginning stages of a parental separation the statement was made   " What used to be simple, isn't simple anymore". I couldn't help but think how profound and deep that statement is to those whose lives have changed drastically in the aftermath of our parents divorce. Planning a family gathering,  making a phone call,  sending a card, looking through photos, just to name a few things,  aren't ever the same again. Today I don't have alot to add to that thought.  Just that what used to take little thought or effort, now takes alot of insight and work.  Maybe you are feeling overwhelmed by the perseverance needed now.  Take heart,  it becomes easier as time goes on , in some ways.   We also can treat our relationships in a way that helps them become more simple again , as we define our own c...

I don't know what it is like to be a man and also an adult child of divorce. Much of what I have read and many of those to whom I have spoken have been women. Maybe we feel more comfortable in sharing our feelings or seeking help and support. I don't know. But today I am wondering what it is like to be a man , who has seen , as an adult, the breakdown of his parents marriage.  Years ago there was a train of thought that implied it was not divorce in itself that affected children, but instead HOW a divorce was handled.  It is certain that the way in which a divorce plays out can be more negative or more positive, but divorce in itself, in the best of circumstances, with the most mature individuals, still has great effects on the children , no matter what the age. In the Journal Of Marriage and Family from Nov. 1985 ,  there was an article entitled  The Psychological Well-being of Adult Children of Divorce  by Norval D. Glenn and Kathryn B. Kramer of ...

Serenity Prayer Worksheet God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen. --Reinhold Niebuhr of ACT                                                  ACCEPT What I can influence                    ...

Adult children of divorce can become discouraged when looking at our family trees. Our identity is a part of those relatives who have come before us and those coming after us, and we realize , if we have not known before, that our tree has missing leaves and broken branches.  Adult children of divorce have unique damage to their family trees, but we are not alone in the fact that many trees have unusual growth patterns, strange and unwelcome fungi, results of outside or inner infection and disease.  We are not alone in the world of unhealthy family trees, but we do need to consider how our trees got this way, what damage has been done and now what we can do to make the tree as healthy as possible. For adult children of divorce our family tree suffers when our parents divorce. I was reminded of this as I recently looked through a photo album of several generations past. The people had normal problems and had tragedies , illness and hardship that sometimes is eviden...

The song  "Forgive" has been on my heart and mind almost constantly lately!!  It kind of gets stuck in your head and you can't get it out!   Maybe that is a good thing in this case .  Check out Sara Renner's website at sararenner.com  and listen to her song that reminds us that if we want to live, we need to forgive. Powerful and beautiful,  from one ACOD to others like us!!  Thanks Sara!!!!