Saturday, March 8, 2014

Adult Children of Divorce Experience Burglary When Parents Divorce

Adult children of divorce experience burglary.  Things are taken.  Stealing takes place.  They are violated.  The parent sees only the boxes they are packing to carry on to their new life.  The leaving parent views what has been given in the past as most important.  The parent who is "moving on" takes belongings, photos, family heirlooms, and they take SO much more!!!

Adult children of divorce are left looking at rooms and spaces in their literal family homes, and the recesses of their minds.  The areas are empty or half full now.  They may be strewn with debris and bring a feeling of chaos and insecurity.   Even when they are cleaned, re-arranged , and filled with new furnishings, the memory of the burglary still haunts and changes the behavior in those rooms.

Adult children of divorce have a lot taken when one or both parents decide to leave.

If you are a parent of adult children and you are considering divorce, realize the enormous changes and hurts your actions will cause your adult children and what you will take from them in the process and how they will feel about it.

If you are a adult child of divorce and you have woken up to find your life burglarized by your parent's divorce,   "call the police, so to speak ( counselor),   begin to clean up what you can,  try to re-decorate and re-fill ,  and establish the "locks" and "safeguards" of setting appropriate boundaries.  

It is one thing to have something taken by a stranger, and it is quite another to have many things taken by a family member.  Adult children who experience the burglary of their parents divorce can feel safe again, but it may take some time!!!



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